No

No I won’t. I can’t. No. No. Damn them all to hell.

Advertisements

Things getting more clear, but not better.

Things are getting more clear in ways that don’t entirely make sense. I remember things that I have never done, but the memories are clear and defined – I can remember smells, sounds, and sensations that I’ve never experienced, or at least I don’t recall them. Could these be some kind of dream memories, recollections of things I’ve experienced in that blasphemous dreamscape that are somehow merging with my waking world? Or are these memories something else entirely?
Continue reading

They didn’t know. Nobody knows

I’m coming back… starting to think straight, but the images, the eyes….   in my mind…  Nobody knows.  They couldn’t know, when they called upon it, when they read the book, how could they know?  I didn’t know.  So old, older than old.  Older than the universe, but different.

The sounds, the piping, orbs of color, but not color, malice.  Evil.  Darkness.  Tekeli li, Tekeli li.

Feel nauseous, but at least I can feel…   still can’t think, can’t think can’t dream.  Dreams are there, I dream about it, about seeing it, about feeling it.

They never knew.  They opened the book but they never knew.  They never saw – they didn’t see what made the sounds, they didn’t see the gate and the truth of the gate.

Yog-Sothoth is not a merciful god, but we are insignificant, less than ants.  But if it were to notice us…   if it were to…  Can’t think of that, can’t.   Head spinning, feeling nauseous again.  Need to lie down.

They didn’t know.  They didn’t know and they read the book and they spilled blood.  So much blood.  And it noticed them.  And it noticed me.

Yog-Sothoth is the gate.

Nightmare Escalations – a Family Connection.

I had really bad dreams again last night – I’ve still been having these cursed dreams at least three or four times a week, but they’ve been similar, with the same heat-blasted landscape, the hideous soldier, and that blasphemous glowing portal, so I haven’t been writing about them as much, as I don’t like to repeat the same thing over and over. I probably should have been writing down the details as I recalled them, waking sweating and terrified, because I think things have been escalating slowly in this bizarre dreamworld, and last night things occurred that I cannot understand or explain, things that have once again shaken me to my core.

Continue reading

The Story So Far…

Things have been escalating again – lots of moving objects and shadows, strange sounds, cold spots.  I’ve made more progress with the spell book, but I’m not ready yet – there’s still a lot to figure out, and it’s not like Amazon sells ‘black magic for dummies’ or anything.  They don’t – I checked.

I’ve been going through all my notes, dream journals, and other experiences, and I wanted to put everything in one place, as a record and to see if there are any other connections I can make. Continue reading

A possible Germany connection? Not sure…

I’ve been doing a lot of research about what’s going on, looking for information on supernatural events, spell books, rumors of magic or demons, anything I can find. Today I was following a web trail and found something that could be connected, based on when and where it happened, close to the time and place my Great Grandfather and his army group encountered their ‘situation’, encountered Yog-Sothoth. It’s something deeply disturbing and, after nearly a century, still unexplained…
Continue reading